nothing, but a... dream.

if, say, you spend your entire life, thriving. slaving. just so you could have a fabulous life. one that lives the super high end luxury life. with hermes as your welcome door matt, but you trade away your youth. your faith. your time. your soul. your everything. but basically in return you get everything you every craved for. dreamt about. but what you lost most perhaps was time. to spend it. to really indulge it. to savour it. none the less you own it. a luxurious fabulous life.

then, here you have the option of sleeping most of your life away. but you can control your dreams. to be what you want. who you want to spend your life with, especially since perhaps he/she might not want you in real life. but you get the power to control it. since after all it's your dream. you perhaps lead a very basic normal life. maybe even a janitor. but you spend less hour, in this shit hole reality. that hurts. that haunts. that does everything wrong. while you have a cardboard as a home, but inside you can create a world of dreams where it will be all fabulous and harmless to yourself. especially since, no matter what, no matter when, there will be a day when that time comes, and you will be a lone again. to deal with life, alone.

so there isn't much differences if you have a million dollars in your bank, and a million fake friends, a handful of precious friends, because in the end you have to endure this loneliness, alone.

which one would you rather be???

you can have everything, you can buy anything, but time. you cannot have it. you will never own it. and it's clicking away. you can decide to sleep your fabulous life away. or dream of a fabulous life.

because if life was nothing but a dream. then i don't want to stop but dreaming all my life. one that is fabulous where it's really about ME. and me alone. and i wouldn't crave for reality, because it's not real or that it would last anyways. since when you die, you can't bring them to the afterlife. so does it really make a differences? to work all that hard for the same thing in the end...

i am going to bed. to sleep my life away. dreaming that fabulous life that i will probably never have in reality. but i own it in my dream. and at least then, i am at least... HAPPIER.
... i need some major sleeping pills. one where i will wake up when reality matches my happy dream moments. ^.^