HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

i wasn't that excited about the new year.

went to the set to wrap things up.
then felt like going out to party.

came back... -.- was so lazy.
the thought of getting stuck in the jam.
with sexy sweaty smelly people on the dance floor...
is just too... YUCKS.

in the end here i am at home. LOLZ.
and i don't even think i will last to 000 hours...
i am SO sleepy already.

been such a long productive happy day.

2010, bye bye. you were great.
i am grateful for everything that has happened.
(including the rm1k stolen... was a VALUABLE lesson...)
i am ultimately happy for meeting UTT. ^^ oh bliss.
HAPPY DIE ME. haha.

2011, be nice. :)

SLUT written

i am wondering...
do i give off...
a... slut vibe?

or... is there a word written on my forehead...
S L U T? or YEE LAI WANNABE???

why... do i always... attract...
attached... guys?

including guys who used to be single...
then not interested in me...
after attached...
... will call me honey, dear, darling, babe, baby...
>.<

ironically before that will call me... bitch, diva, hitler...

HELLO... WRONG PERSON.

i am not desperate k.

pfft.

YAY. a new year is coming.
2011...
...
...
... i don't like that number.
better be an amazing year. tee hee.

and quickly 2012, come quick. haha.
^^

that time of the year

it now comes that time of the year.

where it's ending soon.
and you reflect what happened...
and make new resolutions...
and not keep them.
so i say screw it.

a lot of things has happened this year.
lots of ups and lots of down.
that sort of made my life pretty balanced up.

in general, i guess... i lived life well.
i have everything i ever wanted.
except ben
i felt love, pain, agony. etc
i tasted hate, lust, tears, temptations... etc
i was happy, content, sad, angry, emotional... etc etc etc.

i spent some quality time with UTT!!!
^^ happy die me.

i don't know till today if there were any actions i did,
that i would regret later in life...
but like i said before, regrets are silly...
what ever mistakes you did, learn from them.

always reflect on your life, not compare with others.
if you want to compare, compare with those less privileged.
geeze like so... bitchy, looking down on the less fortunate ones
well it's not to make yourself feel better in life,
rather feel more humble and blessed.

simply because, even tho they are less fortunate in various means,
they have the courage and determination to carry on living.
simple life.

this... writing has some how blown out of proportions. ops.

i like/hate this picture.
it's like one part evil, one part... human. tee hee.


i guess what i am trying to type is that,
the biggest lessons learnt this year is,
that i shouldn't think too much of the future.
shouldn't let peer pressure make me rush into doing things,
that i am personally not ready for.

i should also always have in mind that,
whatever road we take, god has something planned ahead for us.
and whatever the outcome, we should be content with it.
and if it doesn't turn out to be a desired one, just smile,
walk past it, straight ahead to a new chapter.
because there was for sure something to learn from it.

i also learnt that, everybody wants something.
including people who are keen with going out with you, and then announce that if they want to go shopping with you, they have to bare with my bitchness etc etc etc
out of everybody, including myself.
i think, true friendship doesn't really exist anymore.
it's overrated.

so some roads, you are meant to walk alone.
it's probably better that way. no bad feeling towards anyone.
no finger pointing.
no name calling etc.

i also learnt that, you can, live without me.
just that... i am coping this reality without you.

i do think life is fun.
but honestly,
i am so tired of it.

so, next year, i will just live day by day.
not plan anything... much... ahead.

Merry Christmas!

i am so damn lazy.
that is just nothing new.

and because i am also so bored...
i am jotting down some nonsense.

we arrived singapore on tuesday pretty late.
amazingly i drove to the hotel without... a map. HAHA!!!
i guess i am pretty... used to the roads in singapore now. tee hee.
after check in we went straight to geylang,
lorong 9 for an amazing frog porridge.
then... walked opposite for another amazing meal,
beef noodle dish. O.M.G delicious!
went back to the hotel... zzz~~~
well we didn't exactly zzz immediately... we bitched gossiped etc, and made the house keeping come into our room to fix the tv... and that guy was cute... so i didn't mind him coming in and out of the room that night. LOL~~~

we woke up to find this amazing swimming pool...
too bad i didn't bring my speedos but she did! hatez. LOL~


after dyi did some of her errands at the bank we went to her cousin's shop for some pies~~~ ^^

then met up with jevon for a quick lunch at chinatown. ^^


... we made a slight detour to my MUST stop in singapore...
telok ayer street... for my suntory! WOOTS!
had a bottle and told the lady boss i will be back to collect my other bottles...
^^ she gave me a suntory glass. tee hee~~~ happy~

only then we went to the botanic gardens to camwhore. haha.
jevon told us about this featured tree on the S$5 note...
and kinda funny how we manage to find the tree by accident...






jevon dislikes this building near the cathay. tee hee.


caught up with my crazy bling godbrother.


manage to catch a glimpse of orchard's christmas light parade.


and of cause, the highlight and main purpose of going down to begin with was... to meet UTT~
i have met and worked with so many celebrities...
but somehow... meeting him gave me butterflies in the stomach...
and this was not the first time i met him... just never this personal. LOL~~~
oh happy die me.


went to chloe to collect the bag, dine at mos, collected my suntory and off we went home.

it was such an amazing 24 hours trip down to singapore with loads of catching ups. ^^
such bliss. tee hee.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

UTT

oh super duper impromptu me.
utt's team sent an email to me on Tuesday afternoon,
saying he will meet me... on Wednesday evening...
OMG!
... only it's in Singapore...
and without even thinking... LOL.
i said OK. haha.
posted on facebook... my bff said LETs GO...
simply because she wants to do a quick get away from KL.
and by QUICK... i mean... QUICK...
we... left... at that very moment 3pm...
we decided to drive to Singapore to spend the night there
and shop like mad the next day. hahaha!!!
(i was like still in the office... then... ok lets GONE. =.=#)

oh anything for Utt. ^^


tee hee~~~ ^^
oh happy die me.
and yes... we just got back. HAHAHAHA!!!
yawns... panda eyes me later at work...

urghs.

maybe... it's for the best.
i don't know.

... but what i do know is that i really do feel like shutting down.
i am just so tired with dealing with "friends".

i don't know what is real anymore.
... or who is real... genuine...

i feel that facebook is overrated apart from it's videos...
... i just feel really really really tired in seeing people.

so i guess... either i go for a long hiatus... or... make this blog private.
... or just write somewhere else where nobody will see or know.

... i don't know.

... i hate it that he blocked me from seeing his wall. pfft.

best toy of the month!

been throwing away so much junk in the house...


i really liked this dumb piggy bank... there was 3 designs i think

since the kids are no longer in the other room...
i have space in the house ^^
and that means i can buy junks toys!
so i finally gotten my industrial sewing machine.
tee hee.

dad bought me a home sewing machine 10 years back...
=.= gosh i am ancient. haha.
anyhow i never liked that machine...
he decided to buy super randomly and if i didn't want it...
... that simply means i don't need it.
so there and then i had to say yes... because i am greedy.
like wtf. why can't we go around to find a better brand?
at least a brother, singer... something star??? cannot sew at all loh!
so yea that machine... i never sewn anything much out of it...



but today, the first one hour after getting this toy...
i made myself a new curtain.
just for the fun of sewing.
curtains are super duper easy to sew.
and i have so much fabrics in the house.
tee hee~ funs.



weekends are going to be filled with making clothes now.
;) cotton is up. polyester is up...
petrol is up... =.= everything is up...
so yea... better make my own clothes again.
FUNS~~~

... now to shop for a drafting/cutting table...

Dog Days Are Over

Happiness hit her like a train on a track
Coming towards her stuck still no turning back
She hid around corners and she hid under beds
She killed it with kisses and from it she fled

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
The horses are coming
So you better run

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
Leave all your loving, your loving behind
You cant carry it with you if you want to survive

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
'Cause here they come

And I never wanted anything from you
Except everything you had and what was left after that too, oh

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
Leave all your loving, your loving behind
You cant carry it with you if you want to survive

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
'Cause here they come

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
'Cause here they come

FULL VERSION



Happiness hit her like a train on a track
Coming towards her stuck still no turning back
She hid around corners and she hid under beds
She killed it with kisses and from it she fled
With every bubble she sank with her drink
And washed it away down the kitchen sink

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
The horses are coming
So you better run

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
Leave all your loving, your loving behind
You cant carry it with you if you want to survive

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
'Cause here they come

And I never wanted anything from you
Except everything you had and what was left after that too, oh
Happiness hit her like a bullet in the back
Struck from a great height by someone who should know better than
that

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
'Cause here they come

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
Leave all your loving, your loving behind
You cant carry it with you if you want to survive

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
Can you hear the horses?
'Cause here they come

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
The horses are coming
So you better run

... and OMG the original is EVEN better. keke.
sorta beats faye wong, lady gaga, etc etc etc

bigger package

couldn't stop giggling.
just so... wrong.
but it's so... right.
tee hee.



*wink winks*

le mange

meh.
menderitanya.

... just one day.
even just ONE DAY...
this feels like a pure torture.

... surgery is at 9.30.
that's if the doctor is punctual...

can't wait to get a bite of life after this.
urghs. haha.

oh food i miss u...
we can never ever be apart!!!

Just Friends

watched this last night.
was so... drooling. haha.
especially the second clip...
do stay tune till after the credit roll. hilarious sial. heh.

single but not available

single but not available.
this is the easier route to forget.
after all the advise was,

the best revenge is carry on with your life,
and he never existed.

so i went slutting, after so long. keke.
and last night was just exhausting.
the longest kiss ever.
close to 2 hours of mouth vacuuming.
haha.

gosh.
and then there's that nipple nibbling.
totally swollen now.
=.= damnit he probably swallowed my stud.



yes and the cock is pretty much swollen from the 2 hours alternating hj bj... nais
;) naughty kinky slutty.

No Like The Movies

nonsense close to 3am...

there are 10 thousand trillion billions millions thoughts going on about in my head when it touches the pillow. but when i come sit here in front of the computer, the mind just goes blank. goodness, my entire body is dead tired, the mind is exhausted. but yet it doesn't want to rest. funny, that the thought of giving up would even occur to it when it doesn't even want to REST!!! >.< urghs hatez.

but yes there are so much things i want to say... emo emo emo emo emo thoughts. and it's only here, at this space where i still have an outlet to release everything out. not that i am ALWAYS emo, but i feel that facebook is now beginning to be just too... public. this spot, still feels a little more familiar, like a comfort zone.

sighs. i wish there was an off button for the mind.

like an old record

like an old record,
that just keeps playing a rerun,
not because it lacks of new inputs.

... but simply because it does it,
to remind me... that i should move on.

it hurts

-.-#
china was hell.
they blocked EVERYTHING!!!

i can live without facebook...
youtube was pushing it...
... no blog? no pictures? no words to read???
... that was just murder.

food was horrible.
first meal was basically papa john...
last meal was like... mcd!?
haha. -.-

i will only go back to beijing and shanghai...
other parts... well better have a super hunk with me!

it's going to be a super duper busy last two months of the year...
can't believe 2010 is about to end and 2011 is creeping up...
sniff... i will be so damn... old by then. HUR HUR HUR!!!

i hope everything turns out fine.
and there's a major huge birthday party planned for next year...
kekeke.

awwwWWWWWrrrgghhhHHhhhH!!!

yeeeeeps...!!!

i am so not ready for china...
>.<

wish me luck...

... this area feels so ULU... altho i know it's not...
but it just feels like it...

urghhsss... suddenly it feels like i am traveling alone for the first time...
*boss will only come the next day*
... i think i only went on the plane with my parents twice in my life.
then from then on it was me traveling on my own all the time.

even when i learnt how to drive, dad was in the car with me once...
then i was expected to know how to handle it.

how fast time flies... one day i was being carried.
then crawling...
walking...
running...
and... flying... haha.
when will i be, lying?

but of cause secretly i am excited to visit this area. ^^

Fraud Case

finders keepers, losers weepers.
someone is poorer by RM10 today...
found this bank note on the pavement just now. kekeke. *9ish pm*
^^


some times its a good thing the government sector use BM as their communication tool.

the other day, last wednesday to be exact, i received a call,
number was basically blocked.

the first thing the voice said (auto female operator)
was that i have an outstanding balance of one thousand something ringgit...
naturally i was shocked... my first thought it's a call from DIGI!
i was a little confused as to how my bill could be a thousand,
it couldn't be from the simple phone call i made to china that caused it?

so when the operator gave the option to press 0 to speak to the customer representative,
naturally whoever that is on a panic and rage mode would just click it...
and without more than 2 rings someone picked it up...
and claims that i am now speaking to someone who works for EON bank...

i was even more puzzled!!! why am i suddenly diverted to EON BANK???

so i asked him why what when where who how...

and found out that i "SUDDENLY" have a credit card with EON BANK.
it's MINE. i owe them RM8k plus plus... AMAZINGLY, for the past few months.
i currently have an outstanding payment of RM1k to make before my card gets blocked...
... even when i kept telling that idiot i do not own such a card, he insist that i DO...
it's... MINE... i registered it in SIBU...

*actually when he asked for my details like name and ID, after giving it to him, i asked him a question since he has my details, where is this ID's address registered to, which he then told me somewhere somewhere in SIBU*

i was laughing like mad when i heard that ~loh...
SIBU? i have never step foot in SABAH, SARAWAK, let alone SIBU... -.-

... at one point i thought it was a GOTCHA call!!! >.<

only then he "AGREED" that it's probably a fraud case...
he then told me the card's details... and what i should do...
... which was to call bank negara to settle the issue...
ODDLY after he gave me bank negara's number,
he asked if i would want him to divert the call to bank negara...

being BLONDE now, and CHEAP... i figured hey... if banks could do this now...
WHY NOT? i am not paying the phone bill ma~~~ ^^

this is when their entire scam got really fishy... and... obvious.
it's so silly...

first things first, no way in any government sectors would speak to you in pure fluent english...
our national language comes first, only if you request then they will communicate in english.

the bank negara "representative" answered the call in less than a heart beat,
and spoke to me in fluent english, so fluent i was PUZZLED...
hence i spoke to him in MALAY automatically... which gave him a shock...
that lead him into defensive, immediately responding back to me in malay...
... but thanks to his cockiness, which was just a simple line... that i decided to call back...

THAT MA CHI BAI SAID IF I DON'T BELIEVE THIS IS BANK NEGARA THEN CALL BACK LA...
which I did, after calling 103 to reconfirm the number that they gave was indeed bank negara's...

*that gave me a bit of a panic, thinking OMFG it's real? so my ID card does owe them RM8k???*

so i found out after calling the real bank negara (which took me a while to get thru, and spoke in malay even when i chose english) that if the conversation carried on, they would ask me to bank in money to an account to prevent me from getting charges, previously this case was with another bank, AM bank... and NO... eon bank or another other bank cannot transfer the call to bank negara. kekekeke.

the end. a little drama fiasco in the early wednesday morning last week. hehe.

thing is, just never panic... nothing can go wrong if you don't panic...
but when you do panic all hells break thru...
*did i get this right? haha*

... OMG i am so bad at telling stories... :P
*i am BLONDE i am allowed to tell lame stories*

shoes from the past

after 1 week the cabinet is built...
only today, somehow i had some mood...
to rearrange a small portion of my shoes.

this is actually my second + third shoe cabinet... :P
yes, i have issues...



most of these shoes were left in a plastic bag,
either waiting to be thrown...
or saved... but mostly to be thrown.

i should not have attachment with things...

i bought this pair of sembonia when i was...
mmm probably 15?
haha.



i couldn't believe it when i saw my old high school shoes...
^^ oh how i missed those days.
... can't believe it's XX years already. OMFG. haha.
... and the shoes still exist... OMFG!!!


also bought this when i was a teenager... -.-


i think i bought this together with the other nikes... =.=


... was my favorite over priced rubber protection...


bought this out of boredom...
worn them once and hated them...
but they remind me of the first pair of converse my grandma bought for me.
we walked to jaya jusco back then when it was still in TTDI,
she selected them, because it was light.
so till today i will try to get shoes that are light.
^^


my favorite thing to buy whenever i am in malacca. haha.


i abandon this poor shoes way too long...
worn them only thrice i think...


... these shoes, are probably...
10% of all the other shoes i own...

... i should snap wear them before they die...
... shoes should be worn not hidden...
... so now i try not to buy anymore shoes...
because i only have one pair of legs...
and i rarely even wear shoes to begin with...
to damn lazy...

... and that's also why i have so many slippers, tongs, flipflops, sandals...
... yes i have issues.
:(

hufffsss

mmm lately my life is in such a mess.
super messy.
i am super lazy to even do my laundry... -.-
clothes have been piling up around the room... house...


i stole this soap. haha.


something you gave me,
that till today,
i have yet to open it.
i guess, it will forever be my pandora.


life sometimes has no meaning.
you could seek so much for that simple meaning,
but thru out the entire journey...
you just simply forgotten to, live that life.

makes me wonder,
if my time were to stop suddenly...
will i have many regrets?

as much as i would be in denial...
i know i do already have some...

something random

i will be off to china one week from today,
for a week...
(it will be nov when i come back)
i think i will be super deprived of the internet.
no msn. no facebook.

am i mentally prepared for that?

... as expected, K isn't interested. :)
well that's at least what i think.
seeing that he doesn't really responds to my sms.

oh well. life is such a funny road.
i think it's best walking alone and laughing out loud alone.

some random pictures i snapped today.
i rarely snap pictures these days...
i don't know why...
i don't even really bother camwhoring the blond side of me now...

these bananas are huge. they say that this fruit will soon be extinct if we are not careful.



went to visit the set today.
while i was leaving, i took a different route,
and saw this house with the plane,
i smiled a little because it's the house my friend took a picture of some time back...



i think that my england has gone down the drain.

to find a happy

I'm going to find a happy
I'm going to find a happy
I'm going to find a happy place

Seven thousand eyes are watching
watching home and no ones touching
Army of the city workers secretarys lawyers brokers
heading for a london station
Hoping for a quick salvation
Oblivous to cherry cola
trying to sell to every stranger
stuck here its cold im standing
hoping for some understanding
only way to go is inside

I'm going to find a happy
I'm going to find a happy
I'm going to find a happy place

seven thousand light years travel
let my sense of time unravel
traffic is never ending
send those weaknesses decending
towards the upright centre
let the fire rise and enter
tap into the primal power
rising like a gaint tower
creating energy receiving
cut a hole right through the ceiling
people getting smaller as you fly

I'm going to find a happy
I'm going to find a happy
I'm going to find a happy place

bu bo ba ba
bu bo ba ba

find a star
send down a beam
to where you are
an elevator of life
taking you somwhere where you will always be
loved

I have found that stress and nonsense
puts me in a zone of avoidence
could my mind be moving faster
pulling like a super cluster
can be hard to trust a felling
bubbly and ends seeeeing

were going to find a happy
were going to find a happy + bo bu ba ba
were going to find a happy
a happy place
a happy place
a happy place
a happy place

if only it comes true...

i wish.

i am dead.

the pain today was just, excruciating.

don't know how long i will last...

so please... end it fast.

those specs

last night...
sighs.

i don't know how to write this.

...
i met someone last night.
and i like that someone.

but like in the past...

this will probably be another one way street.

so i should just remind myself...
a big huge NO NO...
that it wouldn't work.

i am evil,
and evil people,
well they are not allowed to love.

as simple as that. sighs.

so bad it's good

LOLZ!!!

when Blake posted this on his page i was like...
WTF is this shit!

... then well the bored lame ass me had nothing better to click...
and once i click it doesn't stop...

geeze... she's so bad it's good. kakaka.

seriously... lame ass good. ^^



to know more about this mad woman... click Miranda Sings

... i think i am turning mad soon too.

Annoying Irritating Conversations

i really do hate it,
when someone that i probably have not seen in about...
probably ONLY two months ago...
and out of the sudden we bumped into one another...
they go...
OMG you are getting thinner...
... next time around anyone who says that to me...
i will just tell them back...
OMG its not true... you just got fatter!
and then there are those idiotic bitches that make remarks like...
har... you are going to the gym? for what so skinny already...
... well these sort of humans... they shall now get a bitchy reply from me...
honey that's how i stay skinny unlike your fat lazy ass. :)
... and omg the worst...
huh... you GO GYM? don't look like it...
-.-
i shall now reply you with...
... same goes to you. :)

i mean seriously... OMG... just shut up if you have nothing better to say,
especially when you know nuts. pfft.
it's damn annoying.
i am trying...
what are YOU doing?
#$%^&&^*&(&*&%@$^%$&*&(^)&%$@~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!
pfft.

Perfect Nightmare

heard this song on the radio today...
and...
well... i guess the lyric sort of says it.
mmm...






Sometimes we fight
Sometimes I cry
Why don't I
Just tell him goodbye
Sometimes I should
But sometimes I don't
Build up the strength to
Say that it's wrong
Sometimes I hate
Sometimes I love
Sometimes I hurt
Sometimes I don't
Sometimes I wait
For him to change
But it's okay
I've disguised the pain
And I don't ever wanna leave him alone
They say i'm brainwashed but i'm in love
With this man
Yeah

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
So when will I wake up and scream
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare

Sometimes I keep my cool
Sometimes I let him know
Sometimes I even pack my bags to walk out the door
Sometimes I feel safe
Sometimes I really don't
Sometimes I promise that i'm ready to let him go
But I don't ever wanna leave him alone
They say i'm brainwashed but i'm in love
With this man
Ohh ohhh

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
So when will I wake up and scream
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare

Hoping he's changing
But i'm scared he's not
Can't see a way to leave
Help me open my eyes

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect

Keep telling myself that it's not worth it
I already know I don't deserve it
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
So when will I wake up and scream
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare
No way (x7)
But if it's from you I don't mind hurting
This is my perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare
Perfect nightmare

... i do wonder, if i will ever wake up.

will i be as shallow?

makes me wonder...
not to say that i have a superb body.
but, the definitions here there are beginning to form.

no doubt there's still a lot of work, needed.
bigger triceps. bigger chest.
ass. deltoids. etc...
... bigger everything. LOLZ.
point is the shape is forming.

i just need more food.
to build them.
*i am so lazy to eat lately*

the question now here is...
those guys who ignores me because i am skinny...

i do wonder will i be bothered to acknowledge them back...
the moment i am at par with them?
*coughs* as if i will be at par with them... *coughs*
fit with the ideal body...

and it also makes me wonder...
what was the objective of doing this in the first place then...

to seduce someone...?
to make someone regret?
to make myself feel better?
..............??????
... does make me wonder...
what sort of person i will turn into when that happens...

and why do i even bothered?

... i guess... sometimes it's just to past time.

-.- gosh i have no life. zzz.

DOUBLES

... gosh. this is bad.

SUDDENLY... the whole night...
i am OBSESSED with double eyelid...
to the stage that i am actually googling about it...
and that's a very very very dangerous sign...

because i might just go get it done tomorrow...
LOL!!!
=.= *SWEATs*

must go ogle at more korean faces...
hopefully i will love back singles... -.-
KAKAKAKAKAKAKA.
how random.

eyes gonna pop out...

mmm... goodness.
been watching way too many movies these few nights.
i think my eyes might actually just pop out soon.

yawns...

i think for now i shall stick to reading to past time for the next couple of months.
just too lazy to think or do anything.

... so lazy to even rant about some thing...
a few things... lol.

let the music heal your soul

what an old old song...

but it's true,
you could probably live without watching a movie,
as entertainment... to past time.
i mean, there's always live drama...
looking at people...
fight, cry, scream, etc almost... anywhere...

but singing... music...
you just got to have it. :)

i think those days where a lot simplier.
like those days from the movie "sound of music"
you just sing your heart out...

:(

this has practically been the emoticon that i have been wanting to show.
but it wouldn't even really matter.
because...

well i guess... showing this :) would make things easier.

but that sort of makes,
everyday is a stage play.
every uttered word is a written script.

Time Flies

time flies,
from the moment you are created.

anticipation awaits.
from cells,
you grow.
into a living breathing being.

and time flies even faster,
even while waiting.

clock ticks.
surrounding keeps changing.
...
...
...

some days,
just by sitting here,
the click ticks away,
from morning,
suddenly it's evening.

i wonder what i am waiting for...
what i am living for...

even so, time flies.

my baby boy

it's now been more than 12 years,
since i last held you.

it some times does feel like only yesterday,
that we were running around,
you digging holes around the garden.
chewing my slippers...
waiting for me at the front gate...

i miss you.

i miss the way you round around crazily,
before you would jump on me.

i miss the sound you make on the floor,
that you will scratch it before you lie down.
apparently it cools it.

i miss playing with you.
chilling on the porch with you.

i miss how your fur will always be tangled,
on the sides of your ears.

you were super mischievous.

today marks your death anniversary.
i really do miss you astro boy.
you were and always will be my best friend. :)

big bro always called you "Handome" and you will be so proud...


... i can't believe you made me cry, again.
even after all these years.
i really do miss and love you so much Astro boy.

singapore overloaded

the weekend before this, i was in singapore.
and the weekend before that weekend... i was also in singapore...

i feel that i have enough of singapore for the year.
unless... it's to pick up my suntory.
{damnit a total of 3 trips down and they don't have stock!!! URGHS!!!}
{good thing is... i will get fresh stock directly from japan ^^}

so anyways the first trip down this month was because proffan's butt was itch,
on the 15.08.10, 10am, Sunday monrnig,
asked if i wanted to go down for a KONON-KONON one day trip...
{I SHALL NEVER BELIEVE HIS WORDS AGAIN!!!}

what was suppose to be a fun casino sight seeing then shopping,
ended up, casino for him entirely.
since i refuse to part money that way,
i went walking around, universal for a while.
met up with ethel for "supermodel me" quick brief.
went orchard... shopped at uniqlo... before they invade KL... sighs.



was promised to meet again at 6... which turned out to be 10.30pm.
naturally i was fuming pissed.
so i tortured him by making him go all the way to red hill for YONG TAU FOO.

i forgotten where it was, so we had to walk... a lot. LOLZ.

we were super early, but crowd started queuing already at 11.30pm...
{the stall opens only at 12am}


and when i told him he had to attack when they are ready to serve,
i was so not kidding...


and when i told him to grab everything...
he wasn't kidding...
and grabbed double of everything for each of us...
i ended up eating 75 yong tau foo at 12am that night.
are they were normal sized. believe it.


it was pretty cheap actually for S$20 bucks. haha.

we didn't go home directly...
=.=
he said he was sleepy.
so we went to mustafa center to shop for clothes.
our shopping trip ended at 3am... nap for 3 hours in a cheap motel.
was charged a quickie rate... =.=#
drove back to kl... went to work as usual after lunch...
SIOA BOH!?

conclusion is... never again trust proffan... never.

then came last weekend in singapore,
was there officially for "work".
had to style some models for a competition. ^^
anyhow, am not allowed to bitch about it. zzz.

in this trip, i had the pleasure of crashing in klapsons boutique hotel.
pretty... decent for a small size office lot... i kid you not.
i suspect they refurbish part of an office lot into a "hotel" space.
anyhow, it's superb if you went with your partner not colleagues or friends...
because the toilets... are kinky.
{thankfully passing motion area has a door... -.-#}

see... a shower head... and there's a bed...


i am serious it's a shower...


if you went with your partner, you can see how they wash themselves...
LOLZ. instruct them to clean properly here there...
but sadly, you can't squeeze into that place and shower together,
because that tube is made out of cheap unstable plastic...
so please head to the bed instead. ^^


and that's the door... our room was near the lift...
can you imagine, if your roommate didn't know you were showering...
and came in, while there are other people walking at the hallway?
a total free show. LOLZ!!!


i really love this molton brown shampoos for boutique hotels.
damn sensuous and refreshing.


it's only 2 floors, but they have this fancy lift with tv above your head...


but i really like the reception area.

if you stand at the center of the circle, you get an echo effect of your voice.
tho a bit annoying...


on both visits...
actually ALL my visits... I MUST,
MUST MUST MUST MUST... go to soup restaurant...
apart from harassing the lady boss in Hachi Tei for my suntory...
my next favourite eat till i bloat place is this restaurant...
simply simple yet droolicious!

... i blame daniel soh for this addiction...



and i normally only go to this outlet opposite far east plaza.


after years of hearing Dyi rant about her cousin's pie shop,
(Don's Pie Club, at China Square)
with a special crab bi hun ala carte...
I HAD to hunt it down this time...
i walked 1 hour, to hunt for this shop in chinatown...
with a starving stomach... T.T
ok not 1 hour, just 15 minutes... :P but so worth it.


ok so i might go back singapore some time soon for the food...
and my suntory...
but certainly not to see humans there...
some are rather super fake.
and i can't stand those.
:P

blank

everyday i feel like snapping a picture.
so i can post them here.
instead of writing so much.
but i am just not inspired.

everyday i feel more and more tired.
to do things, anything just feels like a chore.

last weekend, i went down to singapore.
what was suppose to be a spontaneous one day trip,
turned into a night trip...
sighs. will never trust people.
anyone for that matter.

everyday, i feel that i my trust level shrinks less and lesser.

everyday, i feel that i am acting, smiling away.
pretending everything is ok.

everyday, almost hourly, i find myself, questioning myself...
Are you ok?

only to hear the answer, i don't know...
and now, i don't know anymore comes to thought.

and everyday, i think how many more days are left to count.

some people are grateful for so little.
i am so blessed, but yet...

work is sort of my only escape right now...

Move aside Taylor

sorry Taylor honey,
i love your lyrics...
but with 3... or is it 4 albums already?
i think it's high time you move aside,

because JACKIE EVANCHO is now here to kick your sorry little country ass with opera.
good thing Charlotte Church is long gone... else she will be feeling streeeeeeesssssed now too.

simply... amazing voice.
damn her.
... oh and her dad... gosh.

changes, like every season

at times in life,

we change.

some times for the better.
while certain times, it might not be.
although, some times, we mostly do not see it there and then.

some people realize it,
and they tend to hate it.
despise it.

this was what happened some months back with a friend.

she was going thru post natal depression.
kinda scary. seeing how the hormones controls your emotion.
for someone so willful, turned wailful.

hormones got the worst of her.
and mutated her emotions.

what i told her, kinda reminded myself...
how... we don't always have to like
what we see...
what we do...
what we become...
in life itself.

some times we just have to go thru it.
face it.
get it over and done with.

we always change. in life.
it's a daily routine.
we change without knowing.

most time we love the result.

like seasons,
some times we hate it.
some times we love spring.
some times we hate spring.
and when that happens,
remind yourself,
it's part of life,
we don't always get what we want...
to be what we want...
some things are uncontrollable.

when that happens, remember it's only a phrase.
get thru it.
with or without friends...
life is a journey you walk, sometimes alone.

{disconnected}

sometimes, life can be so surreal.

i think, i need a break from people.

less is more.
the more you expect from people...
the more you get hurt.

so expect nothing...
and you will feel a lot more... happier.

yes... this is how it should have always been.

me, myself and i.

i need... i wan... an ice cream now. NOW!!!

wooooo... catchy... and... just WOOOoOooOooOOoooooooo~~~
drroools.

EMOTION

suddenly this song keeps replaying in my head.



shoooz what a tiring day.
just got back from doing...
display in klcc... totally... not my job...
but what the heck... vincent is there... ^^
*SIGHS next week is his last week... URGHS*

but well, next monday... i will be making a 1 week trip back "home"
haha.

i am so going to munch the horribly delicious ice cream melting soft steak.
gosh i should so do frying pan again as well.

so much of things i need to do and wanna eat!

so excited!
so need to cut my hair as well...
diez.
now it's starting to be a damn habit to fly there every 2 months...
just to eat and cut hair...
=.=#

i need more money to keep this lifestyle. ^^

just don't be silly, ever again.

little prince,
you promised to be strong.

so stay strong.

head held high.
and smile.

don't be silly.

W-Zhai

so gone is the old,
and... comes came the new...

thou, regardless of how many new(s) there will be in my life,
i will always remember my first green aluminum tin can proton car...

how i trashed it...
how i... abused it...
how i... neglected it... :(
but even so, thru thick and thin,
it survived and bared with me all these those years...

... i sold it for like... a mere RM2k...
super pathetic... i couldn't even buy a LV out of it...
... my spare handphones are probably even worth more...
... i am speechless......... proton cars... are... -.- junks. haha.

countless time, others have kissed your ass...


i guess only this side, was the most... decent side of the car...


on one of my first few drives, i knock... bang... a tree while reversing, and this side mirror was smashed.
li wei was standing there, telling me to stop and i just kept going... until BANG. and we both laughed. including my dad when i told him... =.= haha.


on the way to shu er's place... years ago for chinese new year, one dumb car refused to move, so i tried to make space, went to the left and suddenly my car was stuck, yi ling then told me, omg i think u just knocked the bmw... it was those old bmw's where they had the huge out skirting... whatever it's called... anyhow... that car... suffered... zero damage... haha... but poor paris... major... for just... "touching" it... this is how... thin our proton cars are... when dad found out, he gave up for fixing the car...


this number... well strike lottery countless times... just that i never bought it... and the bumper... kissed many many many roads... cars... etc etc etc etc... changed like countless times... ^^


so why the change...
we all have to move on eventually...
no attachment in life is a good attachment.

so came last week's wednesday... (14/07)
but presenting W-Zhai only NOW,
(because i got him on Wednesday, and his surname is July... the J sounded like zhai... so hence W-Zhai)
haha. lame.
my ride for the next 6 years at least...
^^

so hansem. ^^







haha. thanks jen, i will try to love the pink side of this... monkey... =.= haha.


... i have been spotting odd car plates... and i think that we can customize them now...
hatez. i would have wanted my prince word... urghs.
oh well... maybe the next car. hehe.